Today. Well its been going on for a while now actually. Since July 2, 2013 the United States Council of Immigration Services has had our application to bring Fisher into the country. This is a necessary approval we need to send our dossier to China. The normal time it takes is 2-3 months. We flew past the 3 month mark last week.
It all started when they wanted to see our actual divorce decrees. (Some of you are gasping that Greg and I have been married before). The application states that they need to see the divorce certificates, which we sent. But for some reason they sent us a request for more evidence, asking for the actual decrees from the judge. (Par for the course) Ok, maybe they want to make sure we are telling the truth about there being no children from our previous marriages. Or maybe they want to verify there was no abuse in the marriage. We keep trying to tell ourselves every time we run into something like this in the adoption that this is our child, and we want them to be picky! If it was another family that he was going to, we would want them to research them just as thoroughly. So we got what they asked for and sent them back in.
Just when we thought surely we were about to get the approval, we get another pink sheet of paper in the mail. OH NO! Another request for more evidence. This piece of paperwork we need is regarding an incident on dad back in 1973 that showed up after the biometric fingerprints. (We all have something like this. It just so happens he had forgotten about it and didn't include it on the application.) We had to send in a request to the state FBI, who said they have no record. Dad doesn't understand why they are asking for so much information on him. He isn't the one adopting. He is frustrated.
So Greg goes downtown to see if the municipal court has record of it. (This is what our social worker told us to do next) No. Ok, can you give us a letter stating why you don't have it on file? Yes, but your father-in-law has to come down here himself. WHAT?!?! Have you ever been to the municipal court downtown? So, to my amazement, dad agrees to go downtown with me to get the paperwork. We take the older kids so we can stop somewhere fun on the way home...maybe Yogurt Mountain? I mean, it shouldn't take too long if we get there early, right? (Laughing hysterically)
When we get down there, I am just being honest again, it was a bit scary and overwhelming. At first, I wished I hadn't brought the kids. We walked in and its like the airport! Security gates, people everywhere! We have to take stuff out of our pockets and we are preparing to go through security when the guy says "Hey, where do you think you are going? Which one of you has court today?" Um, sir, we don't have court today, just here to get some records from your records department. He proceeds to tell us that only one of us can go back. That needed to be dad, since the record was his. Except the officer then looks over the counter and says, "Oh no, you ain't going nowhere. You got on shorts! We don't allow shorts!" YOU. ARE. KIDDING. We drove 45 minutes downtown and stood in line for this? The only thing that kept me from laying down on the floor and crying was my children staring at me. I know they were watching and wondering how mom was going to handle this. Thank you, Lord for my children.
So, I looked around to see if I saw a supervisor. Surely this wasn't true. Shorts? But alas, as of October 1, 2013 (this was Oct 7) they have a dress code at the municipal court. And yes, it included no shorts. And yes, it was posted on the wall. We walked back to the car, preparing to go home and very down heartened. I only hoped that dad would agree to come back another day. When he suggested we go to Walmart and get him some pants. Oh what a blessing! And oh if it had been that easy. Cutter had to go potty. We are in the middle of downtown. there aren't just potties on every corner! We finally found a restaurant...closed. But thankfully, they let us come in to use the restroom.
Then we headed to The Pants Store. The police officer who was working outside at the municipal court was very nice and very helpful. Thank the Lord for him! He told us the Pants Store wasnt too far away. Umm, well, Siri found it, but it wasnt there. Big surprise. So surely there is a Dollar General, right? Yes. But they dont have ANY pants, only shorts. Ok, how about Family Dollar? Yes, but no pants his size. REALLY?!?!? Finally, 1 1/2 hours later, Walmart. Yes, pants, and they fit. So back to the court we go. I sat in the car with the kids watching a movie and I prayed the whole time. After about 30 minutes he came back out and he had the letter! The day ended well with Milo's for lunch and Yogurt Mountain for dessert.
So this morning as I was praying and studying I was asking God what he wanted me to learn from this latest delay and the struggle we were having to get the right paperwork. I wanted to blame it on the USCIS officer, that he was just a stickler and was being too hard. I wanted to blame it on dad, that he should have told us about the incident when we were first filling out the application. But what God showed me this morning is something that is written all through scripture, but for some reason we just dont want to see it. It isnt something that we want to share on Facebook or send to a friend in need. Its something we just want to skip over, because none of us want trials.
"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." James 1:2-3
And if that weren't enough...
“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit." John 15:1-2
These trials are good for me. They hurt. They are embarrassing. They STINK! But according to God's word, they will provide endurance and spiritual maturity. According to God's word, He "prunes" the branches that bear fruit, so they will bear MORE fruit! Look back at the opportunity I had with my kids to show them how to act when trouble comes. I can tell them day after day. I can read them scripture about how to treat those who hurt you. But until they SEE ME DO IT, its just words. I pray that the Lord uses what happened yesterday to burn a lesson into the hearts and minds of my children. I hope they see how we are fighting for Fisher. I hope they grow to love and cling to the Lord just as I do. Without Him I am nothing and can do nothing.
Jesus said, "I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing." John 15:5
Amazing word!! I am still crying. I know that I would have behaved so differently in that situation and then been ashamed. Praying for you guys and Fisher every day.
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